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Tuesday, September 6, 2016

The Trip To The Mountaian Top

The Trip To The Mountain top

Last week we went to Mount Hutt for a ski trip. We had to write a recount about it and then screencastify it. Here is my story that is screencastfied.   


This is my screencastify of the Ski trip. I like my writing because I have used a rang of punctuation and lots of language features like adverbs. The adverb that I used was skiing because that is a doing word because that is what I was doing. Next time I am going to use some more commas so my paragraphs can be a bit longer.

3 comments:

  1. Kia ora Emily.
    I like watching your recording and hearing you read your own writing. Thank you for sharing this. I am really impressed with how you have reflected on your writing and identified your next steps.

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  3. Kia ora Emily Hannah typing.
    I liked watching your video because your voice is really clear and I also love your writing because you give a lot of information in your writing and you next step in great too.
    In your story you have apart about a cow on the road I didn't know about that.So that was good that you added in as much information as you could :)
    Your next step could be maybe more interesting vocabulary.

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Please structure your comments as follows:
Positive - Something done well
Thoughtful - A sentence to let us know you actually read/watched or listened to what they had to say
Helpful - Give some ideas for next time or Ask a question you want to know more about