My writing

My writing

Hey guys, today I am going to share with you some not so great writing and some great writing. I am also going to be telling you what I did wrong or what I did well.

Here is my progress:

 Great writing:

Dear heart earring

I have read your letter and I get it I was not being responsible but wasnt me who fell out of my ear was it, and yes I was having fun but when I went home i was devastated. I went to pioneer the other day and I couldn't find you. I know you are sad but there is no such thing as step twins. He did leave you a week ago and you were not even here 1 year, 4 months 14 weeks, 16 days 94 hours and 24 seconds ago  just saying . You have to stay in that box because other wise i will lose you and i don’t want that to happen. I have to keep those purple things in my ears because otherwise my ears will close up and  they do suit me thankyou.Yes you did suit me but you still do. I will tell purple earring to stop being mean.

From your lovely friend Emily          

I think I used so descriptive words and great punctuation in this writing.

No so great writing:

Cinquain

Winter

freezing,cold

slipping, hailing, skiing

snow falling

inside day's

I can make this writing better by using more wow words.

If you want I would love you to comment so feedback to make my posts and writing better.

Water Lifecycle

Hey guys, I am back with another blog post about writing instructions. Here is my writing.

The water Cycle Experiment

All you need for this experiment is:

1. A small bowl

2. A large bowl

3. Salt

4. Weight

5. Boiling water

6. Glad wrap

Step 1. First you  get your large bowl.

Step 2. Put 2- 3 cm deep of water in the bowl.

Step 3. Put your small bowl inside the big bowl.

Step 4. Add salt to the water.

Step 5. Put some glad wrap over top of the large bowl.

Step 6. Put the weight on top of the glad wrap in the middle of the bowl.

Step 7. Wait a good 30 minutes

Step 8. Observe the results

The water evaporates

Drops of water that are on the glad wrap fall down into the little bowl.

edited work

    Edited work

We are learning to edit our work

 anything in light blue has been improved.

Keyboard Typing Skills

  Keyboard Typing Skills

We have started a new website called key hero. The whole senior hub is using it. I like key hero because it is helping me with writing and with my keyboard skills. This is a really cool website I really recommend it.

Here is my score 

Keyboard typing is really fun and it can help you in prove how fast you can type.

The Trip To The Mountaian Top

The Trip To The Mountain top

Last week we went to Mount Hutt for a ski trip. We had to write a recount about it and then screencastify it. Here is my story that is screencastfied.   

This is my screencastify of the Ski trip. I like my writing because I have used a rang of punctuation and lots of language features like adverbs. The adverb that I used was skiing because that is a doing word because that is what I was doing. Next time I am going to use some more commas so my paragraphs can be a bit longer.

blog comment

writing blog comment before and after

this week we have been learning to write quality blog comments use the key three. here is my before and after

BEFORE-

my comment has no greeting or the key three!

AFTER-

this comment has capital letters a greeting and the key three

I think there should be a age restriction on video games

Age on video games

conclusion

I think there should be a age restriction on video because video games could be violence and  it could not be appropriate for little kids and I could have fighting and swearing in it.

Reason 1

The reason I think there should be a age restriction on video games is because when they are older they could stop playing video games and do it to real people and it can get a lot of people hurt.

Reason 2

They could take the violence from the video game and take it into real life.  It can cause a lot of damage. I really think that there should be a age restriction on video games.

Reason 3

It can also take respect and responsibility out of them so if they play video games they could lose all of it. They could get into a lot of trouble from their parents and others.

Conclusion

I really think there should be a age restriction on video games so no one gets hurt and there is no damage. The age should be in the teens.                   

I think we should do fitness everyday

Fitness everyday

Everyday  we do fitness.We do circuits some of the activities are, large balls,small balls,agility ladder and skipping. We have 30  seconds to do the activity as a group.

Sometimes we do warm up jogs around the court. here s my opinion about fitness.

I really think kids should do fitness from 5 years old so they can stay fit and health that's why it is really good to do fitness everyday.

It is good to stay fit and health by doing lots of fitness and setting goals for yourself  so like run a certain distance in a certain time limit.  You could get into a sport like netball  and all the other sports you could bike to school  instead. In your spare time you could go for a run or go for a bike ride whatever you do stay fit.

Its really good that kids should do fitness everyday because it can help them later on in life. Like if they were late they could be really fast and run to school . It can help them with  lots of other stuff too.

What do you think kids should do or not